Let’s begin here…
Self “talk”. Do you talk within yourself when no one is around out loud? Do you believe that horses can hear our thought? Let’s begin here as all the basis for subjects of conversation start with a thought, right? I have come to see more so after years of living with horses that my expectations of my horses can’t be forced and neither should they be as the horse was created to be a willing partner. Let me ask… what are you coming into this conversation with? Your shit, fear, an agenda, an expectation, a hope, nothing…? Before we even get to talking about intention and energy and such, let’s ask ourselves why we are here and what are we wanting to happen? Let’s not waste the time of everybody should nothing be gained. That is where “getting stuck” happens.
Today my beautiful friend came to visit the Nokota® horse that she is leasing here @VHF. She has been coming here for over a year and has decided it is time for her to have a horse. O.K. so let’s start where? as she wants to start him on her own and not send him off to a reputable trainer. In the time she has been coming to the farm she has had the opportunity to work with and around all 5 horses here. One particular horse she has an infinity for. He is younger than his herd mates and is kind of an odd man out, lone wolf. (Funny because that was his sire’s name.) He pesters and plays hard and moves ever so easily as he glides the uneven terrain in the pastures. He’s also trepidatious, walks away and is guarded yet so much begs for connection. There was about a 4-month period where he was out on trial. The lady trying him out loved his grittiness and movement, his conformation and bone…attractive and strong looking presence. However, her situation changed, and he returned to VHF. His immune system was compromised. You could see where he had a halter on for a length of time. The halter came back with twine wrapped around the poll. It was obvious he wasn’t in the right place even though it was $1,000 a month pasture board. He returned and we started again. I know he can be saddled and ridden though if only a handful of times. This is not what is needed right now. I have 5 horses that all request time with me. Consequently, this horse was on the back burner until recently.
I realized today just how much of what goes on in our brains translates to how the horses feel about us and how important the conversations we are having in our heads, the horses respond to. So… why not speak it? Let’s begin here, a hypothetical with this horse, given something as simple as asking the horse to be haltered. How does that look? Is the horse moving his head or feet away from you even before you get close enough? What does he look like when you walk in with the halter in your hand? Do you have to play games or chase him to get him to stop moving his feet away from you?
Talk yourself through what you want and how to achieve it, set your intention if not speak it, ask the horse to participate, put some energy (as much as you need and as little as needed) toward implementing it. Have the conversation and let it begin there…
“The way you talk to yourself creates your reality”.